“I can’t help the way I am.”

“It’s purely chemical.”

“It’s the way I was raised.”

“It’s my family history.”

“It’s not my fault.”
 

“Life is pain.” – The Princess Bride

We live in a world of instant gratification. We want what we want and we want it now. But there’s a danger in getting comfortable with (and then beginning to expect) quick fixes. Unfortunately, when things aren’t easy or quick, we can be prone toward anger and we can often be guilty of taking our anger out on those around us. Our discouragement and frustration usually end in giving up (failure to overcome our struggles) and giving in (isolating and indulging ourselves to deal with the failure).

Our reaction to hardship in life reveals the biggest idol we all struggle with: a pain- and problem-free life.

On the surface, this seems like it shouldn’t be an idol. It seems like a good thing. And we certainly don’t want to have a pain- and problem-FILLED life. So what’s the problem here?

The problem is that when we fail to surrender this desire for ease and comfort, we can be guilty of making decisions based on whether we believe it will increase our ease and comfort or not, rather than based on God’s goodness, love, and ability to provide for us regardless of our circumstances.

When we have a goal of living a pain- and problem-free life, we begin to do whatever it takes to get it – whatever the cost. 
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We all like to talk about God being all that we need, but the sad reality is that while we are good at talking about God being all we need, many of us are living as though God is not all we need.

Yes, God is enough. But if we’re really going to be happy, we also need this relationship.

Yes, God is enough. But if we’re really going to be content, we also need to live in this particular neighborhood.  

Yes, God is enough. But if we’re really going to show kindness to those around us, they need to show us respect back.

Yes, God is enough. But when hurt and disappointment enter my life, we really need to be able to distract from it by indulging in junk food, TV, shopping, or maybe even a substance.  

Yes, God is enough.

​But. 
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I think one of the biggest blind spots many of us possess in life is idolatry. After all, we don’t often see people worshiping blocks of wood or statues of gold, so we find it easy to brush off idolatry as something from Biblical times that’s not really an issue anymore.

The result? At worst, we can be guilty of dismissing idolatry as a modern-day issue altogether. At best, we may find ourselves resorting to the Sunday-school teaching of associating idols with things such as video games, TV, and money. And while to a certain extent that can be true, the truth is that the most dangerous idols we worship are not physical objects. 
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Asaph doubted God’s goodness when he looked around him. He failed when he compared his life to the lives of others. He became discouraged when he let his emotions fuel his perspective. But when he lifted his eyes to God, he found hope.

When we go through times of pain and suffering, having the right focus is critical. 
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We need to take a step back and see the bigger picture. Not the bigger picture of our circumstances, but the bigger picture of God and who He has proven Himself to be in Scripture and in our own lives. 

Instead of focusing on our circumstances, which constantly change, we need to focus on God, who never changes. Has God been faithful before? He will be faithful again.

​God created us to glorify Him, and He gets glory through being good to us! Our problem is that we tend to forget that God knows more than we do, and so we question His method, forgetting that His thoughts and His ways are so much higher than ours.
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Instead of expecting God to make us happy, we need to expect God to make us holy – and then we will discover that joy is byproduct of holiness. Unfortunately for us, growth can only come through trials; that’s why Peter wrote that our suffering comes for a purpose:  

Anger. Bitterness. Resentment. Doubt. Accusations. Isolation.
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How did we get here? 
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A. W. Tozer once said that what we believe about God is the most important thing about us.

Hannah Whitall Smith explained this idea further in her book, The Unselfishness of God, where she wrote:

What we believe about God is the cornerstone in the foundation of our lives. If we believe things that are not true about God, it will affect everything else we think and believe in life; however, when we believe the truth about God, it becomes a beautiful lens through which we can properly see ourselves and the world around us.

There are five major areas of concern when it comes to what we believe about God:  Is God really good?  Does God really love me? Is God really enough for me? Are God’s laws really that important – or even relevant? Is God really in control? 
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I think it’s safe to say that no one intentionally chooses to believe that God is not good, that He is unloving, that He’s not enough for us, that His commands are meaningless, and that He’s not really in control. However, many of us are living as though those things are true. Subtle lies have crept into our thinking and have begun to affect the way we live. Therefore it’s necessary for us to take a step back and look at the evidence in our lives, look at God’s word, and ask Him reveal what’s true about Him and about us.

Our starting point is God’s goodness. If God is not good, everything else in scripture crumbles to pieces. If God is not good, our lives are meaningless. If God is not good, we have no hope in life, or in death. Everything hinges on this one truth of God’s goodness.

Instead of assuming that you already know and believe this truth, I would caution you and challenge you to consider if it’s possible that you have unintentionally fallen into the belief that God isn’t really good – or maybe that He isn’t really good to you.

You may not be in outright rebellion against God, but is it possible you find yourself struggling with resentment in your prayers, or even have stopped praying altogether?

​You may not be openly arguing and accusing God, but is it possible you’re afraid of God – afraid of getting your hopes up, afraid He will hurt you if you ask for what you need and want?
 
You may not be quitting church or Christian fellowship, but is it possible you avoid certain people or topics because you find yourself envious of how God is working in their lives while you feel neglected by God?
 

I think it's easy for us to get comfortable in life.

Comfort zones can be danger zones, though. When we get comfortable, we tend to become self-centered. We take things and people for granted. We stop giving. We start taking. We become proud. And God's not a fan of our stagnation, and He tends to only let us stay comfortable for so long before He begins to create some friction in our lives. Gently, at first, and then with increasingly more force as we stubbornly hold on to what we believe we need and have a right to - whether that's a certain emotional state of being, a particular relationship, an orderly set of circumstances, or even a way of thought and belief that is comfortable to us.

Our response to these disruptions reveals our heart. The right response is surrender to what God doing, trusting Him, and being obedient even in the hard things. When we surrender, we grow. We change. We become strengthened emotionally, relationally, and spiritually. 

But often we respond negatively, with anger, resentment, and a stubborn refusal to change. That's when things tend to get bad, because God often has to use pain to motivate us to change, as most of refuse to budge until the pain of staying the way we are is greater than the pain of change. 

Jonah is an example of someone who had a very clear comfort zone in life, and when God began to challenge him, he responded in anger. His desperation to maintain control over his life and choices made him emotionally unstable and ultimately estranged from God. 

I'm excited to share this study on Jonah with you. it's one of my favorite lessons to teach. And yes, I know, I'm breaking the cardinal rule of blogging by publishing an article that's over 1,300 words - but I felt like it would be worth it. 

I recommend you pull your Bible out and follow along. For the sake of time and space, I'll only be including key verses as we go through. Start with reading the book (it's just 4 chapters) to familiarize yourself with the story. 

But there’s one another tool that has been huge in my life — it’s so simple, but so challenging. It’s something I recommend for homework with many of my counselees and students. However, because it’s so simple, and also so challenging, not many follow through long enough to see the benefit. And to be totally honest with you, there are many times when I myself didn’t see the benefit. Times when I stopped for a while. In fact, there was a period of over a year where I failed to do this. And I noticed the effect most profoundly when I found my notebook from 2014 just a few months ago.

​I don’t remember a lot of the details, but I do remember that 2014 had a lot of ups and downs, as tends to happen in life. But as I flipped through this notebook, all I saw were the highlights; and all I remembered was the closeness I had with the Lord during that time; the answers to prayer I was receiving; the joy and the peace I felt. It was my gratitude notebook.